Matt Cavanaugh wrote:Tribble wrote:
And, of course, they have it exactly backwards. Growing up without a proper male role-model in their single-parent, women-lead-home, tends to be the worst situation:
A survey of 108 rapists undertaken by Raymond A. Knight and Robert A. Prentky revealed the 60 percent came from female-headed homes,. 70 percent of those describable as 'violent' came from female-headed homes. 80 percent of those motivated by 'displaced anger' came from female-headed (single-parent) homes. "No-Fault Divorce: Proposed Solutions to a National Tragedy," 1993 Journal of Legal Studies 2, 19, citing R. Knight and R. Prentky, The Developmental Antecedents and Adult Adaptations of Rapist Subtypes, 14 CRIMINAL JUSTICE AND BEHAVIOR 403-426 (1987).
This is just one of many citations (studies) from the left and right that show rapists (and murders) come very disproportionally from female-lead, single-parent homes. If it's 'the Patriarchy,' women are doing a fucking bang-up job of passing it on, while men aren't...
These belie the feminist agitprop that Rape Culture is ubiquitous and poisons all men equally.
But discovering a correlation between single parent upbringing & rapist does not show causation. Another factor -- culture, socio-economic status, familial dysfunction, mental illness of the mother, etc. -- may cause both. Have any researchers put forth a model to explain how a single-mom household in & of itself leads to criminal behavior?
First of all, all the other factors have been accounted for. I didn't cut-and-paste everything. I don't want to get terribly pedandic or come across as some woman hater. But the facts are, when you address all other factors, that's what's left. So unless you have a magic factor nobody has considered, your concerns have been addressed in these studies.
But to get beyond that, there are lots of models and they boil down to fathers have important roles in discipline and modeling appropriate behaviors (to girls and boys). In fact, here's a fairly concise summary of basic male/female differences in parenting written by a psychologist I once blogged back in old blogging days when I tried to be a 'somebody' blogger, rather than a blogging dilettante:
Fathers parent differently.
Fathering expert Dr. Kyle Pruett explains that fathers have a distinct style of communication and interaction with children. By eight weeks of age, infants can tell the difference between their mother’s and father’s interaction with them.
This diversity, in itself, provides children with a broader, richer experience of contrasting relational interactions. Whether they realize it or not, children are learning, by sheer experience, that men and women are different and have different ways of dealing with life, other adults and children. This understanding is critical for their development.
Fathers play differently.
Fathers tickle more, they wrestle, and they throw their children in the air (while mother says . . . "Not so high!"). Fathers chase their children, sometimes as playful, scary "monsters."
Fathering expert John Snarey (Dr. John Snarey, Franklin Nutting Parker Professor of Human Development and Ethics at Emory University) explains that children who roughhouse with their fathers learn that biting, kicking and other forms of physical violence are not acceptable. They learn self-control by being told when "enough is enough" and when to settle down. Girls and boys both learn a healthy balance between timidity and aggression.
Fathers build confidence.
Go to any playground and listen to the parents. Who is encouraging kids to swing or climb just a little higher, ride their bike just a little faster, throw just a little harder? Who is encouraging kids to be careful? Mothers protect and dads encourage kids to push the limits.
Either of these parenting styles by themselves can be unhealthy. One can tend toward encouraging risk without consideration of consequences. The other tends to avoid risk, which can fail to build independence and confidence. Together, they help children remain safe while expanding their experiences and increasing their confidence.
Fathers communicate differently.
A major study showed that when speaking to children, mothers and fathers are different. Mothers will simplify their words and speak on the child's level. Men are not as inclined to modify their language for the child. The mother's way facilitates immediate communication; the father's way challenges the child to expand her vocabulary and linguistic skills — an important building block of academic success.
Fathers discipline differently.
Educational psychologist Carol Gilligan tells us that fathers stress justice, fairness and duty (based on rules), while mothers stress sympathy, care and help (based on relationships). Fathers tend to observe and enforce rules systematically and sternly, teaching children the consequences of right and wrong. Mothers tend toward grace and sympathy, providing a sense of hopefulness. Again, either of these disciplinary approaches by themselves is not good, but together, they create a healthy, proper balance.
Fathers prepare children for the real world.
Involved dads help children see that attitudes and behaviors have consequences. For instance, fathers are more likely than mothers to tell their children that if they are not nice to others, kids will not want to play with them. Or, if they don't do well in school, they will not get into a good college or secure a desirable job. Fathers help children prepare for the reality and harshness of the world.
Fathers provide a look at the world of men.
Men and women are different. They eat differently. They dress differently. They cope with life differently. Girls and boys who grow up with a father are more familiar and secure with the curious world of men.
Girls with involved, married fathers are more likely to have healthier relationships with the opposite sex because they learn from their fathers how proper men act toward women. They know which behaviors are inappropriate. They also have a healthy familiarity with the world of men — they don't wonder how a man's facial stubble feels or what it's like to be hugged by strong arms. This knowledge builds emotional security and safety from the exploitation of predatory males.
Boys who grow up with dads are less likely to be violent. They have their masculinity affirmed and learn from their fathers how to channel their masculinity and strength in positive ways. Fathers help sons understand proper male sexuality, hygiene and behavior in age-appropriate ways. As noted sociologist David Popenoe explains, "Fathers are far more than just 'second adults' in the home. Involved fathers — especially biological fathers — bring positive benefits to their children that no other person is as likely to bring.
I read that and I see my parents. I see my Uncles and Aunts. I see myself and my wife. I see my brother and his wife. I see most of my cousins (bun not all of them and those that failed to two-parent their kids... Their kids really suck and are little hoodlums) and every successful parenting couple I know.
So I tend to think what he's saying, as an expert in the field, isn't based on bullshit social-theories, but on actual facts.
Anyway, whether any of us like it or not, when they account for everything, the feminist 'truth' of female single-parenting (with males being useless, toxic, rape-culture enablers) is bullshit. Men, far more than women, teach their sons not to be rapists and to teach their daughters to not be victims of 'bad boyfriends.'
