dogen wrote: ↑
Hi Pitters --
I came of Sertraline (Zoloft) earlier this year -- my own decision, I got so bad at remembering to take it that I decided there wouldn't be much difference if I stopped taking it altogether. Same in fact with the Lialda, which I was on for ulcerative colitis.
However, in recent weeks I've found myself alternating between paranoid rage and bouts of tearful self pity, sometimes culminating in thoughts that my family would be better off without me. I've talked this through with the wife, and we've agreed that I'm nuts, and that stresses at work (where I feel completely undervalued) are likely also playing a role.
But should I go back on the Sertraline? Is this my old problems resurfacing (although my issue was mainly anxiety), or is this some kind of fucked up delayed withrdrawal? Obviously I need to talk to a health professional, but I'd appreciate hearing from the Pit, which contains both experts and those who've been down this path myself.
(No need for sympathy -- got plenty of that during my recent ER trip, ta very much!)
As i've mentioned here before, I was on Sertrline (aka Lustral as it was in the Uk) when I had my clinician depression in the 90s, triggered partly by my Dad's death ( I was 29 , he was 66) from cancer (though other past factors made me vulnerable to depression which I wont go into) . Anxiety was part of my diagnosis.
Having previously tried Moclobemide, an SSRI (not available in the US) my feeling was that drug therapy didnt seem to make a lot of of difference to me (I had several years of counselling as well ) but it's hard to know how worse you might be off than on, . I decided to stop the Sertraline because I had the unfortunate side effect of anorgasmia - I couldnt even enjoy "self love" which was one of the few measures I had at the time. Apparently the part of the brain the drug affects is quite close to that which controls orgasm and sometimes there is unwanted cross over. I came off the Sertraline without any noticeable side effects that I can recall.
Even at my lowest low, I never had any realistic suicidal thoughts - but its partly because I somehow deep down knew that would hurt people and being still barely alive but miserable as hell - was to me, a way of "containing" the depression, So as not to "bother other people" with it . or being guilty or embarrassed by the state I was in, though my reflex was to withdraw anyway.
Anyway maybe going back to Sertraline or trying another to see if works for you. Try to get stabilised then address the work etc situation. But talk to your Doc , one size rarely fits all.